Countdown to the premiere of
Game of Thrones
season two
14 DAYS
(via punctually-particular)
America! FUCK YEAH! but keep the baby
- Woman: Can I have birth control?
- Government: No.
- Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
- Government: No.
- Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
- Government: No.
- Woman: My boyfriend isn't excited about sex anymore, because I lost my figure due to pregnancy. Will you pay for his erectile dysfunction pills?
- Government: Yes.
That’s it. @ThinkGeek just won the Internet.
Schrödinger’s Executive Decision Maker
Why strain your precious thoughts trying to make the right decision, instead leave the choice up to quantum flux! Ask a question with a yes or no question, then open the slot and watch as the simultaneously dead and alive kitty convulses with quantum uncertainty before its molecules arrange themselves, predicting your answer. You’ll never need to make another decision again! Thank you, science and cats of indeterminate quantum states! Available for purchase at thinkgeek for $29.99 USD.
Most expensive coin-flip ever…
The Internet Justice League
This is too perfect.
How is G+ a wattered down FB?
Oh I get it, it has no ads…
(via thegutlesswonder)
Phil, this wasn’t fucking amateur hour. PEOPLE DIED BECAUSE OF YOUR LACK OF SUPERVISION. THERE WERE RAPTORS ALL UP IN THE KITCHEN PHIL. IN THE GOD DAMN KITCHEN.
YOU HAD ONE JOB PHIL. ONE JOB.
I HOPE YOU NEVER WORK IN THIS INDUSTRY AGAIN.
(via thegutlesswonder)
